One of those days ...

 It was one of those days again.  The one where I wake up with a gut wrenching feeling in my stomach.  One of those days where all I do is think about my Dad. 

I can't believe its been almost 8 years. I really don't even know how that can be. 
No matter how many days pass, there isn't a single one where I don't think about him.  

His smile.
His laugh.
The way he said, " Kate." 
His sweat pants. 
His work ethic.
His demeanor.
His love. 

Some days are harder than others, but everyday something happens as a painful reminder that he is gone. 

Its hard to explain how you feel about death to those who have never experienced it.  Even to those who have experienced it, its hard to talk about.  For me at least. 

 I feel like I have tried to burry the fact that he is gone underneath my skin; but like a prisoner plotting to escape, the thoughts of him creep forward in my mind countless times in a day.

 I work hard, I play harder and I try to enjoy every bit of life I have been given, because I know that's what he would want.  I've always appreciated my experiences, and found beauty in things most people wouldn't, but since my dad's passing, I have to say; I love and laugh harder, I stare at the mountains, sunsets, and sunrises longer, and I am even more thankful for every breath I take.  I do all of these things because I now know too well, that we can loose everything in an instance.  

With no warning at all, everything can disappear...

K.